Even Cowgirls Get the Blues

Well, I’m home. The drive was uneventful, just the way I like it. As usual, the dogs were ecstatic to be home. About halfway down the hill to our yard the dogs in the boxes started howling and barking (including Batdog, who had been wonderful quiet up to this point). Crunchie who was riding in the cab with me went NUTS. My previous quiet and well mannered traveling companion started trying to get up into the front seat and stuff his head out of the small crack I had opened in the window. When that didn’t work he resorted to hanging over my shoulder and yowling in my ear. I was happy to be home too, but … geez!

I felt for my new neighbours, who appeared to be camping in a trailer on their property just a ¼ mile from our place, as the yard was constantly noisy from when I pulled in at 2:30am until I got the dogs all put away at 4am. Oh well, best they find out what living next to us is like sooner rather then later!

Now, don’t get me wrong – I adore my home and my family and am thrilled to be back here, but I must admit, upon getting up on Monday morning, the biggest feeling I had about being home was the sense of being overwhelmed – the mail, Mark’s reminder that we were leaving for Alaska in 6 weeks, drop bag stuff that needs to be planned and purchased, emails, things that need to be straightened out as the arrival of winter caught us off guard, phone calls that needed to get made, vet visits, missing computer stuff, money juggling, sponsorship stuff, bills to pay, training runs that need to be done….I felt like crawling back into bed, covering my head and just staying there. That feeling has been following me around all week, like a little black cloud. I haven’t even been able to really enjoy that wonderful Sealy Posture- pedic mattress that I moaned about missing when I was in MN. I had been tossing and turning most nights – eventually giving up and just getting up early. Feeling more tired when I got up then when I went to bed.

Yesterday morning I headed into the city to pick up a dog that was shipped out to be bred to Gus. She was a little late arriving at the airport and I was a little early so I thought I’d head over to BestBuy and look for a couple of CDs I wanted to pick up to add to my iPod before leaving for Alaska. At the top of the list was Tim McGraw’s new CD “Live Like You Were Dying” – a song I just love, so when I got back in the van that was the one I popped into the CD player. The first track “How Bad Do You Want It” really hit home.

It takes about living your dreams and what you have to give to do that (if you are interested in hearing a clip from the song, check out http://snipurl.com/amho .

It was just the slap in the face I needed. I am living my dreams – I can think of no life I’d rather live. It’s just that some days it is hard to see the forest for all the trees.

I picked up the dog, had lunch with some friends, got a new haircut (including some funky blond highlights), took a pizza home for dinner and by the end of the day felt better then I had all week.

Thanks Tim – I needed that. I slept like a baby last night too.

Karen